M has to be one of the greatest husbands ever. I was kind of over the internet yesterday, mostly because my Mac has been funky and I had no interest in stripping it clean, restoring to the factory settings and then reinstalling all my software. Blech. It also couldn't keep connected to the internet to save its life and 30 seconds of a clip on YouTube had to load like 3 times while playing.
When he got home I was mid dressing change. He's probably seen me naked from the waist down more in the past two weeks than during the entire prior history of our relationship. /tmi. Anyway after I alcoholed and covered up we had the normal how was your day conversation and I ranted. I went on and on about how I wanted to put the computer down for a bit, it's heavy and hard to keep on my lap for long periods of time, plus this on going internet issue, blah blah blah. He smiled and nodded. After he had brought everything in and started dinner I saw him go back outside with a blanket? I was all where you going, he said he'd be right back.
I couldn't fathom what he needed the blanket for, a new kitten, a cactus, what? Turns out he was using it as wrapping paper and beneath the green fleece was a new MacBook Pro. I cried. And felt like an ass for all the things I had just said. But man, it's nice and so clean and I don't want to make a mess of it. My last Mac was my first Mac and now that I know about them, I'll do things differently. The new touch pad will take some getting used to, but I'll be a pro at it in no time.
He's so awesome. I often remind myself that we never know how our life is going to turn out. What I have discovered since my days in Boulder is that you have to work at life. I think that also may be called growing up, but we don't all do it at the same pace. I used to sit there and wonder and worry how was I ever going to escape the life I had made for myself. I saw no exit at the time but as I started changing I began to see a new pathway. A path out. It required effort and self discipline to keep clearing the obstacles and moving forward. As I look back now, I can see where I have come from, it's been a long journey and it's never going to end. However you never know what or who you are going to find along the way, it's a great a reason to keep going. I'm so glad I have M with me now, helping to push aside the occasional debris or just to simply walk hand in hand.
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