When I went in for pre op the RN goes through all these medical question and then asks...
"What do you like to do to relax?"
This always reminds me of being in Russian class and having to come up with a generic list of things you like to do, listen to music, talk on the phone, watch movies, read a book. Basically all things you can do on an iPod these days. I'm totally comfortable with silence, I don't need music or a magazine to distract me. I can just be me and be more or less okay in a stressful situation. So I told her I liked to hold M's hand to relax and she told me that was the best answer she had ever heard.
It works too. At 2 am last night I had had enough, my back was tweaking and I missed my husband, I took a pain pill grabbed the wedge pillow and shuffled into the bedroom. I laid down and settled in and it was lovely. His hand found mine and squeezed. No nightmares last night.