But the follow through. Not so hot. I had an okay week. Lots of sushi, lots of grazing, a lot of tossed food. (Into the trash or the disposal, which I ended up clogging as the result of cleaning out the fridge.) A few more pastries than I would have liked. I wish Apple coffee cake wasn't so damn likeable actually.
I spent a few days paralyzed by fear and what ifs. Had a nice chat with my mom about what happens if the surgery doesn't go well. I hate to worst case scenario, but I suppose it is better to be prepared. The last two times I woke up from surgery and things didn't go as planned... I was a mess, a mean horrible spazzed out mess. I can't let that happen again. It's unbecoming at best, abhorrent at it's worst.
This Narrating Illness class is going to be good for me. Pain and illness is relative, but there are familiar themes running throughout. We all have a story to share and that is comforting.