I need a dress

So you can't wear white to someone else's wedding. And M won't let me dye my own wedding dress. It wasn't much and I will probably never wear it again, I would love to have gotten more use out of it. Anywho... I don't feel like shopping. My weight was 156.6 this morning so it's not a fit issue, it's a money/time issue.

M will be spending big bucks on hearing aids and me being unemployed and in school, I am hyper conscious of every penny spent currently. Sigh-- I'm sure I can find something for under 100 bucks. I just need to find the time.

Week is flying by. I have been riding my bike between the storms and cooking very healthy dinners. School is so busy I barely have time to eat, it is all on the run. I pack fruit every morning and nuts, but that's been about it during the day. Sugar and protein.

Time to cram in some more chemistry.

It's like learning a language

Immersion style. That's what Chemistry will be like, or so the Proff says, but I am sure he has never immersed himself in a language. It's like that money guy who says that paying off debt is like losing weight, do the two relate? Maybe.

So it went just fine except that I got soaked on the way across Harvard Sq. I didn't even have to go far, but buckets fell from the sky, I had to take off my shoes and roll up my pant legs. (I had on jeans thinking the first lab was today, grumble) My umbrella was almost useless and the water dripped off my bag and down my leg. I sat freezing cold miserable through the almost 3 hour long class. I lined myself with paper-towels before class started and it was only marginally helpful. I had brought a sweater (trying to be prepared) but the wool was damp and even putting my rain coat on over it didn't help much. I can not express how cold I was. Nail beds were turning blue, teeth were chattering. I have cold womans disease, but this was over the top. I'd give anything (well, not anything) for the days when weather like today made me sweat.

I rode my bike home and it was a fast ride, less than 20 minutes. w00t. If only this unsettled weather would move out. I'm transporting myself tomorrow-- Twin Sis has her Vespa in the back of my truck for transportation to some competent mechanics.

Day One of the Summer of Chemistry

I'm nervous. Summer school when I was in high school was a blast. But I am not sure that the Russian was as hard as the Chemistry will be. Maybe it is all just a bunch of hype-- so someone can make a few more bucks tutoring. I dunno, but if M is about to drop 7500$ on hearing aids then I can figure this out on my own. I don't begrudge the expense at all. Last time he looked into new ones his were already 5+ years old. Now they are two years older and the technology is so much better. New ones would be good for both him and me. There was some stress yesterday around a misunderstanding and I felt just awful that he didn't hear me. But the small twist cone (crikey!!! that's a small) with Jimmys did make me feel better. Sort of. But only because I took forever to eat it. I actually put it down when I got home to tend to something.

The cat found it. I came back into the dinning room to see our BooBear licking the cone which was still standing!

So anyways-- I need to get my but to campus. I'll take the bus in, bring my rain coat and come hell or high water I will ride my bike home today. I'm sure my knee could use it.

I also weighed this am. 159.2. I'll take it, twin sis was over yesterday and there is now less than 20 pounds between us. She'll weigh less than me I am sure. I need to get working on my peace with that. ;-)

My yummy meal

Picture isn't as good. But the Pot Pie is delicious, I use Phylo on top and today's has chicken, potato, corn and carrot. Also fresh dill and rosemary and the creaminess is just 1/4 cup of flour and 2 cups of 2% milk. The original recipe came from Everyday Food-- my version gets modified for veggies I have on hand.

Food Porn

Twin sis dates this guy who feeds her. This meal was a few weeks back and I bet her portion is the one on the left. Even still it amazes me that after meal after meal of yummy foods she is still losing weight. (they also go out and hike, fish, wander, whatev) You can see pictures here. She photographs lots of things, but her food pics are my favorite.

Bzzt Bzzt

So.... Class starts Monday. I had a long discussion with the tutor about how I ended up deciding on the Harvard class. There are other options, but none that fit my schedule or were near my house. There was no way that I was driving to UMass Boston everyday from Watertown. Instead, I'll ride my bike, which I got all spiffed up and is waiting for me to pick it up on Monday. NE was too long (12 weeks) and the vacation in the Outerbanks with M in early June was invaluable to our relationship. I am also expecting we will spend a couple weeks on the Cape at the end of the summer and BU's program while not as long as Northeastern would have cut far into August. It's not that I can't grasp this material-- it's just the speed at which it comes. I showed the calendar to M and his reaction, "Woah!"

I also asked the tutor (who is one of the buffest guys I have ever met) if he notices wether people lose or gain weight. His answer was worded oddly. But yes seems to be the general consensus. No time to eat? I wonder what the scale will tell me in 8 weeks.

Hopefully under 160. Still hovering just above it. Grrr.... A little more chocolate lately. M is dealing with a chronic health problem, but this is of the come and go variety. It's been 31 months since the last attack. I had been convinced he was all better it had been so long-- it will pass. I don't need snacks to help me deal. I should continue to repeat that.

I still struggle with the emotional eating sometimes. But in teh great scheme of things I don't eat like I used to.

Time for dinner-- I made a pot pie. And the buzzer on this Hot Point reminds me of the stove from the house in Barre. It's also electric, my only beef with this fabulous kitchen. I miss the gas, but grew up with electric, I'll readjust.

Reminder

I have so much to do it seems. And not enough time. I need to remind myself that someday if I want to give out weight loss advice I should be an RD. (In Massachusetts you are required to be licensed.) And to do that I need to take Chemistry and then a couple years of grad school... The summer class hasn't even started yet and I am already doing hours of homework.

I'll get there, I just need to keep at it. I mean really how hard can it be compared to losing it and keeping it off?

Busy Bee

Weight was 160.8 this morning. ToM. But also I have not been eating as well as I could be. Too many snacks from an unexpected stress.

I also still can't find my silverware. :c( All boxes are unpacked and it is not at 35. I wonder where I misplaced it.

I'm loving our new home, back to it.

Cooking in my own kitchen

YaY! The unpacking is getting there. So liberating to toss out all the leftover takeout today. Vegetable Lo Mein. Chicken Place. Stonehearth Pizza with Bacon and Olives.

Salad with Steak and Peas tonight. I rescued the vegetable box and am declaring a ban on all takeout for at least the rest of the month.

Mass. Blue Cross/Blue Shield signs on to Google Health - Boston.com

Mass. Blue Cross/Blue Shield signs on to Google Health - Boston.com

Ummm, no. I do not trust Google with my medical privacy. I've been following this via the snark on Buzz Out Loud. While I am curious-- I am glad that we are staying with HPHC. I'd be tempted to try it out otherwise and deep down I just don't feel like this is a good idea.

Not really, but it is funny!

more cat pictures
The scale annoys me, but the heat, too much Diet Coke, Salt and a few drinks over the weekend and I was 1sixty2 this am. (Ugh-- I need to get my keyboard fixed.) It fluctuates up and down. I just wish I was fluxing a few pounds less.

I could have eaten better this weekend, but when I put it in perspective there is no way I ate 14,000 extra calories. Which would equal the 4 pounds. I need one of those scales that tells you how much is water... Meh, I need a graphing calculator first.

It is so freaking hot and I feel like my moving progress is stalling out, especially after a weekend of partying, reunioning and the the Celtics game from a suite last night. Today I have been reattaching hardware from the painting I have gotten done, putting away the kitchen and well, that's about it. Oh and some Chemistry. And of course I have been laying in the cool of the bedroom lamenting the fact that I am ridiculously unmotivated today.

Tomorrow will better. Hotter, but better.

Slow Down Sparky

I love the place we are moving into. However, the it has not been painted in a long time. It was built in 1926 and in many places the original paint is still there, but marred with anything from spackle, a random coat of primer, polyurethane (on the baseboards), smoke, grime, dirt and food. We have now painted M's office, my office (well primed at least), my closet :D and the bedroom. M's office was easy-- no one had ever painted over the wood work. Thank goodness, trim is the devil. Twin sis helped out in a huge way tonight. A nexus of rooms-- my office/closet, kitchen, hall closet, dinning room, bedroom and bathroom all meet in the same place. It's boatloads of trim, but not much wall space.

Not sure what or when I'll paint more rooms. There was much discussion about it tonight. I'd like to get it done... but things like the bathroom will have to wait until August. I have never seen so many blue paints sponged on highlighted with silver metallic clouds. The extra paint (4 different colors) is still in the closet. I should take pictures for posterity before I paint it down-- my crappy description doesn't do it justice. The dining room and kitchen are a tossup as to which first. The living room will be last-- not much bare wall and paint-free trim. I'll spend more time taping it off. Colors are TBD and the landlord asked me to paint the bedrooms first and see how it came out. I extended that slightly but I understand why he is wary of people wanting to throw color up on the wall. I'm living with the aftermath of that gone wrong, I have every intent of keeping with feel of the house and faux painting is just not.

I'm very excited to start unpacking over there. We will be moving the cats and hopefully a mattress before 9 am in the morning. I'm not sure I can pull it off, I missed the Fox 25 morning news every day this week because I slept too late. I'll give it the good old prep school try.

The coming crush of activity

Today I have some more moving and packing and upper body working to do and a chemistry tutoring session at 5:30 for a break. Tomorrow it is up bright and early and off to my high school for a fun filled day of reunioning. It is not our 15th but the class ahead of us. It will be fabulous to see some old friends. The weather is supposed to be hot and humid but I don't care. One of the activities is a leisurely hike- I am so there. I was never active in high school and never took advantage of those kind of things. I hated the Mountain Day tradition, felt like it was a forced death march and did as little PE as possible. The things I missed out on.

Then Sunday home very early via the flea market, more packing and moving and then w00t a Celtics game. I know it is not just any game. It is the free food and drinks that have been hyped, but I am more interested in the experience. Alcohol has too many empty calories for me.

My right bicep

Is twinging. Between the magic erasering of the grime that covers our new place to the painting it has been well worked. I am sore and going to bed. Tomorrow I get internets and am moving my kitchen to the new place. A girls got to eat.

Welcome to my Wardrobe

There is less than 20 pounds between twin sis and I now. w00t! I missed being able to share clothes. It's been years.

Trending

Back to 159.2 this morning. I would like to be around 155, I am very comfortable there. The cardio of the move will help. Since I don't want to blow a months rent on movers, we are moving lots of the boxes ourselves this time.

The bulky furniture can be left to the professionals. So to that end last night my mom came over and helped me pack up my china closet. Like my Gram (who would have been 81 today) I can never have enough. I am hoping that when we move I will be able to use the Hutch that came with my dining room table. It still lives in our basement and M's grandmother's wedding china would look so nice stashed inside. I think it will require hoisting over the back porch. Alas. Also, the idea of being bum rushed with all our boxes next Wednesday is a bit much. There is more than enough storage to start putting stuff away even if there is no real furniture yet.

So off I go to prime so thetwin sis can help me paint this evening. On Thursday I'll be waiting for RCN and will have internets! And if M has his way, a new TV.

To Do

Vacation is officially over.
Tomorrow I need movers, a Chemistry book, and to start packing.

I'll start my day with my own iced coffee too. I bought half and half today and am making Toddy tonight. I normally drink whole milk in my coffee at Starbucks, but we keep 1% here for cereal and hot chocolate. I'll add a T of half and half for creaminess and be a happy camper. I'm looking for ways to cut my expenses... I hope I can stick with this. My coffee shop in Colorado made our iced this way and it was yummy. I have had the Toddy maker forever but haven't used it. Now is a good time to start I think.

I held out as long as I could

I signed back up for MFD today. I need to be able to track my calories and nutrients and the free ones just weren't cutting it. Spark People, The Daily Plate, FitDay. I even tried one that was based on pictures!
I need it to keep me honest and even though I was thrilled to see the scale at exactly 160 this am. I know I can be doing better.

Want to know what I ate today? You can click <here>.

Feeling less stuffed

I had 20g of fiber before I went to bed last night and this morning things were moving. I literally had to chew each bite of these hockey pucks of fiber over 50 times. My husband suggested some fiber supplements, but I prefer things that I can actually feel cleaning me out. The texture of these will assure that. If you can't see it, each has 14g of fiber!!!



So about Grandma-- She was always backed up and either took pills to go or not too go. She lived well into her 90's and although she has breast cancer it was her colon that felt apart at the end. Her insides had spent a lifetime of being way too full or way to empty and in the end, they just broke apart. Or so my mother tells me. I was still in Colorado when she died, but before she did she and I got to spend a delightful car ride together from Pittsburgh to the Cape. She had worked hard in her youth but got heavier later in life, too many Twinkies and white bread. But as she got even older the weight came off her again and I was amazed at how well she continued to get around. That long car ride was hard on her but she handled it like a trooper. Especially when every time we stopped the handicapped bathroom was as far away from the door as you could get. She probably ate too much red meat and sweets but she lived a long full life as the result I think of her youth spent on the farm. Her only real chronic health problems (that I knew about) was the afore mentioned constipation.

I think that is hereditary. Now that I am more or less regular I miss it when I am not. It doesn't take much for it to go wrong. When I was heavier I got backed up all the time. No wonder-- I ate nothing with fiber and drank very little water. A week would go by and my lower intestines would start to ache. I relied on laxatives to get me moving again but would have to take many... The results were often unpredictable and then when Grandma died, well, that was a good reason to be eating more fiber instead of relying on pills.